Nov 302015

I’ve managed to complete 30 days of blogging for NaBloPoMo. They’ve might not been the best but I got them done so I’m proud of myself.

Today has not been a brilliant day. I feel like I’ve come down with something and spent most of the day asleep. I’m hoping that it’s just a small setback and I’ll be feeling a bit better soon. Tomorrow Johan is home all day so I’m wanting to be awake for it.

Johan made me cheese on toast for tea which was yummy the first time I swallowed it. Unfortunately it’s not so nice the second and third times. I wish my body would digest food properly as I’m still bloated from last night’s dinner. Silly body. With that and a blocked nose making it harder to breathe I’m a bit grumpy today.

I’ve learnt some interesting things from my FitBit. On average, I wake up every 40 minutes or so when sleeping. No wonder I’m so knackered. The longest stretch I can go without waking up is about 90 minutes. I already knew I woke up a lot as I have to wake up fully to roll over, but didn’t realise it was that much. Activities that raise my heart rate above 100bpm include being propped up, rolling over, peeing, having my teeth brushed, watching television and moving my legs. Sometimes peeing and rolling over take it above 130bpm which I found interesting. I’m pretty weak but my heart is getting a workout. It also says I walk 50-100 steps a day which is funny when I can’t walk. The FitBit is useful for trying to keep an eye on the amount of activity I’m doing though.

I’m not going to force myself to blog everyday in December, but I’m hoping that I’ll be more in the habit of blogging more frequently. I’ve got a couple of longer blog posts I want to finish that take more brain power so hopefully I can get them done.

 Posted by at 11:56 pm
Nov 292015

Christmas Chain

Today I started out super tired, with a stuffy nose, headache and sneezing. I think I’m starting with a cold which is not fun. Once I woke up a bit we watched Inside Out which is an awesome film. I’ll probably watch it again and I know some people who would really enjoy it. We also watched more Hell’s Kitchen.

I somehow managed to complete the long fishtail chain I wanted to make for securing the pillow to my wheelchair. I decided to use green and red as it’s coming up to Christmas. I really like making them as it’s relaxing and it’s the only design that doesn’t hurt my hands (apart from tying a knot at the end).

I hope tomorrow I’m feeling a bit better. I don’t like this level of exhaustion as my brain stops working properly and I need more help with figuring stuff out, especially with the carers. Breathing through my nose would also be nice. I hope this isn’t a cold.

 Posted by at 11:58 pm
Nov 282015

Today has been an interesting day. We’ve been a bit bad at missing my painkillers for a bit and today my pain levels got a bit out of control. Since it was obvious I wasn’t coping we decided to give me extra painkillers as I’m allowed to do so. The only problem with that is it makes me really dopey and out of it so I’ve done very little today. Johan was amused when I slurring my words and getting stuff wrong. Is like the worst parts of getting drunk without the good bits 😛 It did sort my pain levels out so it was worth it.

What has happened is lots of deliveries, so Johan was busy. I still need to go through all the boxes and check everything is there and then I’ll figure out how much wrapping paper I need to get. I did get the most awkward ones wrapped as I know Johan struggles with anything not a cuboid.

Once the worst of the dopeyness had eased off we watched telly. Johan and I watched more Hell’s Kitchen and in the middle Esther joined us to watch Doctor Who. The Doctor Who episode was excellent but also incredibly creepy and will probably give me nightmares. I’m really interested in what will happen next week now.

Hell’s Kitchen has been a lot of fun to watch with Johan. We’ve just got one episode of season 11 to watch left which we’re saving for tomorrow. It really amused me how Johan got increasingly annoyed with their pronunciation of risotto (the Americans pronounce it like re-zo-toe, we pronounce it more like ri-sot-toe). There’s also the difference in pronunciation of fillet but that’s easier to understand and cope with. Risotto is one of my favourite dishes so I’m glad it’s on the menu but only Gordon Ramsey says it right 😛 Of the two finalists of this season my favourite is Mary as she’s so nice.

I’ve no current plans for tomorrow. Will depend on how I’m feeling and things. I do want to make another long loom band chain to use for securing the pillow to my wheelchair so might start that if I’m up to it. I’m hoping my pain levels remain bearable now and we do a bit better at remembering my medication.

 Posted by at 11:55 pm
Nov 272015

Today I took advantage of some of the sales to do most of the Christmas and birthday present shopping for Sammie. Have just one main item left to get and as it’s tech am waiting for Monday (though I’ll keep an eye out before then). Being able to do shopping from bed made it so much easier- I wouldn’t want to be shopping outside today. Tomorrow the bulk of them get delivered and hopefully we’ll be able to get them wrapped in the next couple of weeks. Need to buy wrapping paper first though :)

When Sammie got home from school we spent time talking, playing a game of Hearthstone and watching YouTube videos. It was nice 😀 Talking to her cheers me up loads, even when I’m already happy 😀 Johan joined us and it was funny seeing how they interact as they have a similar sense of humour. Talking to two of my favourite people in the world at the same time is awesome so I had a brilliant day.

Didn’t manage going out as though I was well enough, the weather was absolutely appalling and it would have been pretty late. We’re rearranging it for a day when we don’t have a weather warning and we have more time.

After Sammie went I spent time watching more Hell’s Kitchen with Johan. Personally I wouldn’t trust any of the chefs to run a kitchen, but I know very little about cooking. Still, raw meat and poultry is not good. We’ve only got a few episodes left of this season so we’ll probably finish them tomorrow.

Penguins are awesome. Friends sent me pictures of penguins and that was amazing. I am so so lucky to have such great family and friends. I don’t know why but I’m so grateful. *Flaps*

 Posted by at 11:54 am
Nov 262015

Working on my anxiety about the carers. Luckily was two nice ones so was able to get stuff done. Had to ask Johan to come home at lunchtime which is annoying but luckily he was able to get out early and make me more comfortable.

Have been watching stuff on Netflix today. Finished watching The Hunger Games: Catching Fire which I’d started a few months ago but had to stop. I prefer the book but it was still a good film.

Was making a very long fishtail chain (ended up being 1000 bands and over 10 feet long) so put Hell’s Kitchen on as something in the background. It’s the US one and it is not a very good competition format but it’s hilarious as a reality entertainment show. Made Johan jealous as he wanted to watch it while he was raiding 😛 He’s now watching it with me while I’m writing this. It’s funny though the amount of undercooked chicken, salmon and pork is scary 😛

Tomorrow I’m going to be doing most of my Christmas and birthday shopping. I have a plan and hopefully my body will let me keep to it. If not it’s not the end of the world and it can be done later. I also might be going out for a hot drink with my sisters in the evening if we’re all well enough. Physically I’m doing okay other than pain and my digestive system hating me which is a good sign.

Penguins are amazing and people are really nice to me and I don’t really understand why but it makes me happy and keeps me going when my brain is being nasty to me. Hopefully my brain will stop being mean to me.

 Posted by at 11:40 pm
Nov 252015

Watched Doctor Who with Esther. Too many feels. Argh that episode. *Sniff*

Anxiety is still bad but I managed to let the carers help me a bit today. I know what my brain is telling me is completely irrational but it’s hard to argue with your own brain. I went on my computer and managed to organise some tickets to see the Enchanted Park next month, even sending emails to sort out a carer ticket and why mine was broken. Also played some World of Warcraft where the guild boosted me through heroic Archimonde so I’ll be able to get a moose mount. Thank you Trivial :)

Also tried the Tavern Brawl in Hearthstone with Sammie. She was winning then I got a great set of cards which changed it so I won. Hopefully we’ll get another game in before it finishes.

Got out of bed while evening carer was here so my bedding could be changed. It was nice :) Johan gave me hugs from behind. Stayed in my chair for about an hour.

Digestive system is now being very mean to me so I’m gonna curl up in a ball and ask for penguins to be heated. That seems like a good idea. If anyone knows how to make a brain stop telling me I’m evil, please let me know.

 Posted by at 11:57 pm
Nov 242015

I am not coping. My brain is twisting everything to make it bad. I’m trying to fight it but it’s so hard. It was nice carers today but even then I panicked too much to have anything done. Tiny things like receiving a Facebook message or someone dropping something makes my head feel like it’s exploding. I’m not nice to be around.

Hopefully tomorrow will be better. If not will try and see the doctor as my anxiety has been getting worse for a bit and though I’m not sure she can do anything she definitely can’t if she doesn’t know about it. Bleh.

 Posted by at 8:59 pm
Nov 212015

Went out today! First went into Gateshead and got my head shaved at a barbershop (they initially said they couldn’t do me until Johan explained what I wanted). I now have basically no hair and it feels weird but it’ll be nice to not have to worry about washing it for a while.

I felt okay and we were a bit hungry so decided to go into Newcastle for food. We went to Wagamama as I’d never been there before and Johan likes it. I had dumplings which were very nice. Getting the Metro was difficult as it was as everyone was travelling to see the Newcastle football match, but we managed to get me on.

We went to Grainger Market next, where Johan failed to find any games in the retro gaming shop and I found a penguin cupcake in French Oven. I’m still full from lunch so will have to eat it later. Next was Geek Retreat which was very crowded. I think I’ll go back when there’s less people as it was hard to see what was there, but I had a nice hot chocolate.

Looked in Forbidden Planet and then Travelling Man. I couldn’t find anything I wanted in Forbidden Planet but bought Pandemic from Travelling Man as I’ve been interested in it for a while and we were wanting a game that works well with two players. Getting around these small shops is hard in my tank 😛

We were starting to think about home, but the Newcastle match had just finished and I knew the Metro would be packed. I also had misplaced my gloves and as the temperature was now below freezing asked to go to Primark to buy some more. On the way Johan looked in PC World for a keyboard (he couldn’t find the one be wanted) and I got confused by the pile of monitors in the middle of the aisle in a shop which is otherwise easy to get around (though the displays are too high for a wheelchair user).

In Primark I found some really big penguin thermal socks, and then two different pairs of penguin gloves. We looked at the warm slippers but couldn’t find any in my size. While doing so I managed to knock the penguin cushion under my legs so I couldn’t feel it, and thought I’d dropped it. We ended up backtracking and Johan asked the staff before he checked and found it. Near the counter I spied a multipack of normal penguin socks, so bought them as well. While helping me sort things out Johan found the gloves I’d already been wearing under the Trabasack but I’d bought penguin stuff so it was worth it. I was very tired by now so we went home.

It’s been a really good day. I probably overdid it but it’ll have been worth it. The most exhausting thing wasn’t being in my chair and it, but trying to communicate as I had no voice and typing was difficult while moving. I think if I go out when I can’t speak again I should take a Bluetooth keyboard as it’ll make typing much easier.

Tomorrow if I feel okay I want to go on my computer as I’ve not been on since fixing my tablet and I think it’s been over a week since I was on to do fun stuff. I also need to start finalising my Christmas shopping lists. Before then though I think I need to sleep 😛

 Posted by at 8:52 pm